He said he'll be done in an hour. As I say this, it has almost been 2 hours and Christina Perri's famous words from a "A Thousand Years" are looping in my head.
"I have died everyday waiting for you"
Then he bursts into the room and says "done!"
Much of life these days revolves around waiting for the husband to finish his work. This is like penance for making him me wait for me in the past. I have tried my best to use the time constructively but sometimes, (ok more often than I admit), I lose my steam when playing the waiting game.
God makes me wait. Isaac makes me wait. I am...THE WAITER!
Glad to know I still retained a dark sense of humour in these trying times. It's innate.
Now, let me check on the "doneness", for he has disappeared again. Not quite it seems. I try to be understanding. The demands of work are hefty. It's not like I am a stranger to it but now I am.
It's hard to be kept waiting-indefinitely. I wish I wasn't the recipient of it all and these days, besides devouring sermons and books ( I ran out of TV series), I literally try to be still. It's an art. (That I have yet to master). The new-agey people do that all the time but God says, to meditate on His word day and night and I can't even still a stray thought for more than 2 minutes. Like now. I ramble and ramble.
I hope to learn the lessons God wants me to learn asap so I can exit and enter the next phase. It will most probably also contain waiting but then, I would at least have mastered the beginner's course to cruise through the intermediate level. Now, I am but a novice.
Dear God, HELP.
No comments:
Post a Comment