Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Friends

How I classify them:
1) those who can pronounce my name right.
2) the rest

One of those who is very very dear to me will be relocating halfway across the globe. I always knew this day would come and no matter how long we had, it always felt like it was too soon.

It feels like I'm losing an important part of me, a tad bit of being "left behind" too. But I know and grateful for the privilege that we had each other for so long. And no matter where in the world she is, I know that part of me will be there too. Thank God for technology that will allow us to still keep in touch.

This brings me straight back to 2000 when we had to part ways for college and this left me crying for ages. There are and still will be tears but I'm strangely at peace this time round.

God really took the best for this mission.

Monday, November 26, 2012

Injustice

Read the whole book of Micah. In two versions. Again and again.

Really praying that God vindicates and rights the wrongs that I'm witnessing live in my workplace. The wrongs perpetuate so relentlessly with no physical indication of anything going right. Righteousness is remote and almost extinct. In fact, I think existing structures promote lawlessness without any ramifications.

Lord, please give me a strategy now that I still have authority. I don't want to be a pontius pilate in this situation. Neither do I want to act according to what is wise in my eyes and compromise others unwittingly because I was too smart for my own good.

I vacillate between despair that justice will prevail and being encouraged when I read the bible. God's love is unconditional and He fights for all who are oppressed. No matter what creed, religion and race they are from. The church was meant to take the place and be His representative on earth but they have by and large abdicated that high call.

I wonder now..what is more to this? To let God be your sole vindicator or to act? If so, then how?

"let the righteousness of God be a holy flame that burns"

Monday, November 19, 2012

Dormitory life

I always wanted to stay in a dorm. I imagined it to be fun to have flat mates and all. Late nights mugging and eating and chatting together.

I missed that boat when I dropped out of Murdoch for Nus.

Somehow life made a u turn and threw up a little surprise later on in life during a time and place I never expected. God has a thing if weaving my forgotten desires into the tapestry of my life.

Now I live in a dorm. We share tv shows,laugh ourselves silly with modern family and new girl and cry buckets together through sad movies and trials. (I do crime shows alone) Except that I didn't expect dorm to be with two boys. One of which I have a marital covenant with.

I thought it'd be endless slumber summer nights with girls in PJs and plenty of Ribena. A lot of giggling and crying. Now it's just me with my years, tears and fears. My own hormones on display while they spectate and not participate in bewilderment. That's how I can feel so lonely with company. Sometimes I feel like I can relate more to the girl on tv than anyone here.

Sometimes it just gets so lonely.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

poetry


  喜欢寂寞
  词曲:吴青峰
  主唱:苏打绿
  扬起了灰尘 回忆里一场梦
  那照片里的人 瞳孔曾住着我
  阖上了过往 梦境活成河流已滋润了身旁 真实中的脉搏
  生命来到窗前
  不吭一声 拎走了我们
  谁为情所困 谁为爱牺牲
  谁比谁深刻
  当时奋不顾身伸出我的手
  看见了轮廓就当作宇宙
  甜美的习惯变成生活
  才了解了什么
  如今故事发展成就一个我
  学会了生活能享受寂寞
  剧烈的语言变成温柔
  又带来了什么
  若是不曾走过 怎么懂
  翻飞了往事 有时灼伤眼眸
  那伤人的台词 现在听来轻松
  平息了心思 有时一笑而过
  我此刻的样子 见风仍然是风
  生命吹过面前
  不吭一声 划成了掌纹
  挥霍了缘份 看透了景色
  我懂得深刻
  当时奋不顾身伸出我的手
  看见了轮廓就当作宇宙
  甜美的习惯变成生活
  才了解了什么
  如今故事发展成就一个我
  学会了生活能享受寂寞
  剧烈的语言变成温柔
  又带来了什么
  若是不曾走过 怎么懂
  当时奋不顾身伸出我的手
  看见了轮廓就当作宇宙
  甜美的习惯变成生活
  才了解了什么
  如今故事发展成就一个我
  学会了生活能享受寂寞
  剧烈的语言变成温柔
  又带来了什么
  若是不曾走过 怎么懂
  

Give your heart a break

Tuesday, November 06, 2012

长大的约定

你是友情,还是错过的爱情。

Saturday, November 03, 2012

So thankful

God has vindicated me his own way. The renegade lamb with nothing to shout about led her little team of so few to double retail sales, jump through so many obstacles and after a few setbacks, still win. He let me meet beautiful people, draw out their beauty, witness the depths of human kindness and team work in action.

At some point, I took two steps behind and wanted to cry and marvel at the glory of it all, fall to my knees lift up my hands and thank the Lord!

In the middle of the atrium in plaza sing.