A brand new decade

It wasn't like I imagined. At all.

I didn't hyperventilate and faint. I didn't feel an exponential increase of wisdom or overwhelming fatigue (as with age).

I had a simple day. Almost like any other ordinary day. But I'm thankful. I haven't had ordinary for too long and I have since learnt to not take ordinary for granted.

I didn't get to sleep in as I would have wished to due to construction and my part-time helper vacuuming up a storm too early in the day. I went for tea with Mum and shopped. Nothing fruitful came up in this expedition except free samples (thank you Clarins) and a bright coral dress (at a hefty discount! thank you God!).

Dinner was Italian's at La Nonna and because I specifically insisted that we have no cake, we got me Mao Shan Wang durian ice cream instead. It was rich and yummy, although not exactly the best for my over-heated constitution as manifested in my zitty face.

I'm so glad that my turning thirty gave us all an excuse to get together after all the turbulence my family went through this year. I'm so glad work gave Isaac a reprieve so he could have dinner with me. I am SOO thankful.

Looking back, I just cannot imagine how God saw me through these thirty yers (there, I said it) even though so many times, I thought I wouldn't make it. The finish line seemed so close and dismal. Every birthday was like a harbinger to more trials but despite all the trials, His grace and love saw me through. Even when I misunderstood Him. In fact, His love and faithfulness were the only constants in my life when everything else was in chaos and disarray. Just a few months ago, every area in my life reeked of the stench of despair and death. The death of marriages and health. Now, spring finally arrived and even though circumstances are still less than ideal, I have an innate joy and confidence that I haven't had for the longest time. I guess that's the best birthday present really.

Some have asked me what they can get me for a birthday present. I used to decline politely because I know I was too picky and didn't want to cause inconvenience especially if it turns out to be a gift I won't use. This year, it is different. I still decline but because everything I need and really wanted can only be gifted by the Gift Himself. I just want to be closer to Him, to know Him and to win and comfort souls for His glory.

So job or no job, child or childless, I just want Him happy and that every moment I live to be a Jesus-filled, God-glorifying moment. I want to eradicate complaining and self-pity out of my system and form new habits that demonstrate Him. It won't be easy but thankfully, it is not by my effort but His.

So there, Happy THIRTIETH birthday to me! Thank you sweet Lord!