15 years since I gave my life to Jesus only to realize there is still a firm deep seated throne of self within me.
Today I was knocked out by drugs thanks to a cold but it suddenly hit me that I don't know Jesus at all.
He is not just the righteous judge waiting around to catch me make a boo boo. He is all gentle yet strong. He decimates his enemies with unconventional methods such as dying a cruel death on the cross to disarm them of all power and render them completely impotent.
Most of all he loves me in a way that I never will know why and how. Because I'm just me and he is God.
There's litle much else to say except that I want to rediscover the lover of my soul again and love him with every bit that I have in me.
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