who are we really rejecting?

"they don't see you as i do"

i like that God sees me covered by the blood and accepts me in all my humanity. he sees hope in my future despite the little that i am. i don't wanto ever grow independent of him. i like it that He walks through the valleys AND mountaintops and my weaknesses are not repulsive to Him. His love is not cancelled out by anything i do and at my lowest, i can always expect His love to be even sweeter and stronger.

one of my main struggles in life is refusing to fear and take into consideration man's opinion and making the concious choice to put God's opinion over all else. even though He is unseen and they are seen ( to the naked eye).

its so easy to subject myself to the scrutiny of man and allow my esteem to fluctuate according to their moods. not that God sees me as perfected but the acceptance He has for me by virtue of Jesus' qualification and justification is something no man can ever give me and i cherish that more than anything else in the world.

man might read one page in my life and dismiss me but God knows the story, from beginning to the end. and He is determined to walk me through more than i want Him to.

i'm determined to do the same and even though sometimes i fail and find myself swallowed in pride as i despise certain others, nothing pains me more than when even the church despises its own. its nothing out of the ordinary shd we suffer persecution from the world but when the world offers more acceptance than the church, something is seriously wrong.

sarah allis yang shared today about her experience of walking freely and finding acceptance to God, imperfect as she is. i love her spirit and she is one of the christian leaders of today that i truly respect. she doesn't preach a message. her life is the message. her and her whole team at the ark will put any religiousity to shame and i'm so glad our paths crossed. i like the fact that she doesn't bother to hide her imperfections by donning religious robes /dresscodes and comes truly as she is, with her imperfections and flaws. i love her team so much i have to fight impulses to swim over to the states to join them.

i long for this kind of fellowship and brotherly love and i can see how pleased the Father is when His children are like that and having been in the church scene in singapore for well over 10 years, sadly, i have never came close to what they have.

if there weas a prototype for all of us to conform into, then we're missing it. the church of Jesus Christ is meant to be a diverse church because Christ came for the world. the church should have room for all sorts, and not the perfected. the perfect belong to their own narrow minds and should make room for those Jesus died for, the true inheritors of the earth. the sinners, the sick, the outcasts, me.

i wish someone would remember the pit they were hewn from and know that if all they're looking for is top grade (measured by the world's standards , ironically), they cannot expect a revival. coz top grade pple don't think they need Jesus and are few and far between.

make room and shoo!

**
a black man was cast out of a white church some 100 years ago. he lay outside crying at the door, disheartened and dejected. suddenly, Jesus appeared to him. Sobbing, he cried out "Lord, they won't let me in".

Jesus lovingly replied "Son, they won't let me in too"

**