the cross is not where i pass through to heaven, its where i dwell , my source of life.

today i learnt about a 4 year old girl who despite her age, with her finesse and fortitude puts me to utter shame.

at 3, she was discovered to have leaukaemia and was prescribed painful chemo sessions which caused her hair to drop and endless pain. Traumatic enough for any adult, she took it well in her stride and claims its no big deal to have cancer. Her spirit was informidable and strong.

She went around in her baldness and when asked why she didn't wear her hat to hide her baldness, she replied indignantly showcasing her finest strength in that moment like this.."so what?i'm still beautiful"

and she won my heart. and respect.

**
and lately the Lord has been showing me about the importance of knowing who i am. knowing so will make me stand firm, on solid ground and be immovable even when all around me circumstances are like shifting sand.

Jesus' identity was often challenged and the devil taunted mercilessly to get him to prove that he is truly the Son of God. from the 40 days in the wilderness all the way to the cross, there were numeral instances of him being taunted to prove that he is the son of God. indeed he suffered utter humiliation on the cross where as he hung crucified, God didn't show up in a mighty way to deliver his son. his son had to endure not just physical pain but mental agony as those he is giving his life for spit on him with scorn and pride, scoffing at the most High. thank God he endured. for then i can be reconciled with my Father. and praise God because the endorsement from Heaven eventually came when He rose from the grave, 3 days later having conquered hell and satan.

even more so, today, the same creep relentlessly taunts me by trying to cast doubt in my head of my identity. not that i don't know that i'm saved by grace and heaven is my destination but i was behaving more as a slave than a child of God. when the pressure caves in for me to choose, will i choose His way , their way or mine.

while i knew my heritage, i didn't know my inheritance. its almost if the inheritance died out when it reached me and the heritage is a shameful foregone past. but its not! i have an amazing heritage having descended from Him and to be called His child and my inheritance..well the bible says i'm a joint heir with Christ and that has to be alot!

everytime i call upon the name of Jesus, whether in praise or as a cry of help in distress, all heaven stands at attention. i wear royal robes as an indication of my identity in Him and my standing in His sight. i'm well loved and is the apple of God's eye...because in this i know so because God sent His son to die for me.

God had to remind me all that so that when the world challenges me to compromise the things that define me on the inside and corrupt the nature of Christ deep within me, I can firmly say no. I can refuse my flesh and embrace my spirit when the flesh rises up. when doubt and fear assuages me, I can run to my Jesus knowing there is a refuge for me. when the standards of the world dip alarmingly, i can rise above.

if there's nothing i can cling on to in this world, let me never lose my identity. coz its the one thing that will lead me home.