almost

i was talking to shuxin on msn and i nearly jumped off my chair when she started sharing abt her dad's business and all. for a moment or two, i was truly envious. there i was erupting with business ideas but w/o the means to execute a single one but she could so easily.

but its ok. i am so happy for my grown up friend because we used to be such ding dongs together back in mgs. and really all we cared for was our shopping allowance. now that we have moved on to other people's shopping budget and allowance, i can safely say that yes, we've grown quite a bit.

someone help me to rest. i sit in bed nursing my flu and i just explode in my head with ideas and ideas n more ideas. and a deep sense of helplessness coupled with a few shots of excitement. i'm so excited abt the idea of executing it yet i feel so helpless coz i need the expertise and the CAPITAL.

offers have trickled (not poured) in to fund my ideas but wisdom arrests me and gently suggests that i should probably do alot more homework and learn first, from the veterans and i guess that makes my job the perfect place to be in. coz i meet retailers from start ups to renowned ones on a daily basis.

at this point i really need to relax and rest a lot more and concentrate on getting well but its tough when i'm so activity-oriented. God help me. i dream so big and while many say its a good thing, i wonder (still) if any of it will materialise. because the fear of disappointment still lingers. because i see my own disability and i wonder. if its ever achievable. so while both feet are firmly planted on the ground and my head inthe clouds, i need some help in flapping my wings to fly.

i can sniff heaven already. still jogging in circles and picking up momentum but not quite there yet.

silly me, someone remind me its never about me and yes its all achievable. by Him and His divine empowerment. thats what i like about grace. not just being undeserved but a divine empowerment to execute so so much.

all for the glory of Jesus.