5 days in an entry

this week:

i haven't had time. been too busy. infact i have a headache now.

but im generally alot happier. God has been more than very sweet, patient and kind. thank God for onlinebibles that have been my main source of strength and encouragement in the office. it allows me to tune in to God surreptitiously without looking too obviously skiving. i love the message version so much...

this week on the whole has been a huge emotional rollercoaster ride (whats new?). for awhile i thought i'd just remain in shock and i thought i'd never snap out of it. i thought i'd just play dead so the troubles will leave me alone but alas, thats just a lousy lie fromt he pits of hell. i might as well face it and enforce the victory that Jesus has purchased for me.

slowly but surely, i feel something inside me transpiring. im still tempted to panic and give into frustration about many many things but really...the light inside me is shining much brighter than the seemingly overwhelming darkness and its been so heartening knowing from non christian collegues that they see it in me. the noticeable difference that i never really quite believed was truly palpable tangible and visible. apparently the glow of joy is so noticeable especially during crunch periods. to Jesus be allt he glory i say. most glad to be able to shine for him. of coz it shouldnt take their testimonies to validate the truth that sits snugly in my heart...so i don't know why im still surprised.

***
okok now the drumroll segment. the corrinne may concert!

its like how good lor. i was so in awe.it ministered to me in so many ways i can't describe so i'll try to do it in the best way i can. im such a fan now so forgive me if i tend to be biased.

so glad mei ling asked me to go even before i heard her songs. yah..i think we booked the tickets so long ago that i had to be reminded of the concert. my tearducts activated from like the first song and by the last song, i was all puffy and mucusy. not a pretty sight so thank God its dark.AND its no way the sad sappy kind of ambience...theres just so much hope and you can almost see the struggles she had to go through. its all reflected in the beautifully penned lyrics which i believe was inspired from a greater source. (WE SHARE THE SAME GOD) after all the crying, you can't help but feel hope and joy. shes just yet another glorious testament of His goodness and faithfulness. i don't know exactly what journey she had to take to be where she is today but that beautiful night at the esplanade concert hall, i could almost see Him smiling down on her.

i dunno but her songs speak volumes and it seems to speak directly to me. don't ask me to commento n the technical part, the acoustics etc...i won't know what to say.i can't tell the difference. all in all, i feel like i can identify with every song and she sounds so much better live. i love her already as a person and theres just something so beautiful, raw and vulnerable about her that you just can't help but love.

i wish i had pictures but no photography allowed. sigh.

***
sch has officially started for zac and i feel so odd and displaced being where i am...working. it almost feels like yet another holiday job and i'm just patiently awaiting to choose my modules. i miss lectures, lunches with him, the cheap food...etc. i miss the whole experience, the good and bad.

gone.

now i'd just have to embrace this unique part of my journey alone with Jesus and wait patiently for him to join me in the workforce. Hez been very well taken care of by Jesus and ...i'm going to cherish every minute of my journey. yes, even though its not altogether a 10/10 experience and it drives me to the brink of despair all too often.

allthings will work out for mygood as the word has promised and i know that i'm learning and growing and being shaped and moulded into all that i was made to be.

slowly but surely.