Saturday, January 26, 2008
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
my world is too big
i have bever been a good planner. i have never successfully hosted a party or even planned a day well. i'm impatient and i'm the kind who settles for the first possible vendor. not scout around for the best. i just want chop chop fast fast. and i'm being bombarded by suggestions left right center. and i just came back from KL. for once, i'd like to remain in kl.
and now i have to plan the single most important event in my life and it's very very scary.
i wanted a lunch reception buffet thingy and i thought it'll be a small cosy affair that requires coordination not months of meticulous planning. my family assured me that with just less than 10 cousins in total from BOTH sides, things shdbe kept relativelysmall. but small is relative. because apparently i have a lot of relatives (pun fully intended). latest count is *drumrolls* : 250 and counting.
i may have less than 10 first cousins but half of singapore is a 2nd cousin. then we must also adopt a global view and not just invite relatives who are in singaore. but from overseas. *Faints*.
but mum is very reassuring "no problem, still small enough tohave buffet"
so dear folks, i'm going to set the record for the world's longest buffet line at this rate. don't think church camp. think guiness records..because isaac has 10 uncles and aunties on just ONE side and they all have a few chidren each.
maybe i shd make it potluck.
and now i have to plan the single most important event in my life and it's very very scary.
i wanted a lunch reception buffet thingy and i thought it'll be a small cosy affair that requires coordination not months of meticulous planning. my family assured me that with just less than 10 cousins in total from BOTH sides, things shdbe kept relativelysmall. but small is relative. because apparently i have a lot of relatives (pun fully intended). latest count is *drumrolls* : 250 and counting.
i may have less than 10 first cousins but half of singapore is a 2nd cousin. then we must also adopt a global view and not just invite relatives who are in singaore. but from overseas. *Faints*.
but mum is very reassuring "no problem, still small enough tohave buffet"
so dear folks, i'm going to set the record for the world's longest buffet line at this rate. don't think church camp. think guiness records..because isaac has 10 uncles and aunties on just ONE side and they all have a few chidren each.
maybe i shd make it potluck.
Saturday, January 05, 2008
dust
it's 6.17 am and i've been awake for an hour because of a throat infection. it feels like blades in my throat and i'm in great pain. am upset because i feel mocked and defeated. but i'm going to press on for victory and i know it's a matter of time my God does more than silence my oppressors.
on a separate note, i don't know if this is anything close to a quarter-life crisis but when i do a headcount of the people i love and share a deep affinity with, the numbers keep dwindling. and upon that revelation, i get very very sad.
granted, there is more quality gained than quantity lost but i can't help but still ache somewhat. i've been told that this is a natural passage of life as 'people come and go' . if this is true, i'm not getting used to it and i find it so hard to accept.
these days,i'm getting messages from people that i used to be so close to whether in childhood, adolescence or young adulthood that are so indicative of the fact that yes, we've grown apart and yes, it was so good, yes, i missed those times but i'm too lazy to update you about my life. one recently said 'thank you for the childhood memories'. another reaffirmed that i was still cared for and remembered (somewhat) in a special way. everything in past tense. bah!
i don't even know howto feel and vascillate between being comforted that i have the assurance that i was (note: past tense) an integral part in their lives and heartache knowing that these people who shared so much of my life with are now gone.
when these things come all at the same time, i get very very weighed down. i can't help but feel so ...discarded. i understand the demands of our lives and time and that meeting up frequently is impossible. and i'm not asking to be best friends again but what i'd appreciate is that a little update on the impt events in ur life. just so there is a semblance of keeping in touch.yes, all to assuage my insecurity and neuroticsm
perhaps they don't know i still care.
on a separate note, i don't know if this is anything close to a quarter-life crisis but when i do a headcount of the people i love and share a deep affinity with, the numbers keep dwindling. and upon that revelation, i get very very sad.
granted, there is more quality gained than quantity lost but i can't help but still ache somewhat. i've been told that this is a natural passage of life as 'people come and go' . if this is true, i'm not getting used to it and i find it so hard to accept.
these days,i'm getting messages from people that i used to be so close to whether in childhood, adolescence or young adulthood that are so indicative of the fact that yes, we've grown apart and yes, it was so good, yes, i missed those times but i'm too lazy to update you about my life. one recently said 'thank you for the childhood memories'. another reaffirmed that i was still cared for and remembered (somewhat) in a special way. everything in past tense. bah!
i don't even know howto feel and vascillate between being comforted that i have the assurance that i was (note: past tense) an integral part in their lives and heartache knowing that these people who shared so much of my life with are now gone.
when these things come all at the same time, i get very very weighed down. i can't help but feel so ...discarded. i understand the demands of our lives and time and that meeting up frequently is impossible. and i'm not asking to be best friends again but what i'd appreciate is that a little update on the impt events in ur life. just so there is a semblance of keeping in touch.yes, all to assuage my insecurity and neuroticsm
perhaps they don't know i still care.
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
God has a sense of humour...
when He made us friends and now colleagues. it's like sense and no sensibility. obviously i'm sense.
so while pondering about what we should dress up for the company d&d....(btw, the theme is movie night or something like that)
me: let's dress up as characters from...
together: mulan/moulin rouge!!
clearly, despite the same pronunciations for the first word, it's very very far apart lah. it's east and west and they just refuse to meet. you must have a mental image of the whole situation to understand the hilarity of it.
we threw out ideas of being mushu coz its dragon which is super unheavenly creature.(unlike unicorn) and toyed with the idea of being a horse...(the one that mulan takes to battle)..ieshe can be the back of the horse and i'll be the front etc etc.
i hate to say this but i think moulin rouge is more feasible, achievable and we'll eventually end up going with her idea.
*hmphs*
so while pondering about what we should dress up for the company d&d....(btw, the theme is movie night or something like that)
me: let's dress up as characters from...
together: mulan/moulin rouge!!
clearly, despite the same pronunciations for the first word, it's very very far apart lah. it's east and west and they just refuse to meet. you must have a mental image of the whole situation to understand the hilarity of it.
we threw out ideas of being mushu coz its dragon which is super unheavenly creature.(unlike unicorn) and toyed with the idea of being a horse...(the one that mulan takes to battle)..ieshe can be the back of the horse and i'll be the front etc etc.
i hate to say this but i think moulin rouge is more feasible, achievable and we'll eventually end up going with her idea.
*hmphs*
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Incase you're wondering..
i survived it. i'm still here.
i'm inhaling in 2008 and exhaled 2007 successfully. i still can't believe it was over. it's so surreal.
it's like the feeling i get when i board a plane. because i lose my bearings mid air and the clouds give no indication to where i really am and neither the plane gives any indication that i'm actually moving FORWARD, i feel so weird when i land on foreign soil and find myself in another timezone.
gulp.
i'm inhaling in 2008 and exhaled 2007 successfully. i still can't believe it was over. it's so surreal.
it's like the feeling i get when i board a plane. because i lose my bearings mid air and the clouds give no indication to where i really am and neither the plane gives any indication that i'm actually moving FORWARD, i feel so weird when i land on foreign soil and find myself in another timezone.
gulp.
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