Friday, July 29, 2011

1 Peter 4: 7-10

The end of al things is at hand: therefore be self-controlled and sober-minded fo the sake of your prayers. Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. Show hospitality to one another without grumbling. As each has received a git, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace.

Amen.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Amsterdam

I'm heading to korscenbroich this evening. Amsterdam was literally a whirlwind and sometimes when I travel it feels like time freezes itself as I sprint around. For example if ibleft home on the 25th of July I almost expect it to still be that date when I next return home. I'm strange that way.

It's lonely and I'm thankful gor technology and most of all, my constant companion Jesus Christ. Nothing sticks closer and though I fear, I am learning that he can be trusted and will take care of his sheep.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Happy birthday to me

I think I'm finally rid of the intense desire to want to hide under the bed and avoid my phone like plague when my birthday swings round.

This year, there is no fanfare and gatherings because there is just no one and all my closed ones are out of town.

This year, thanks to the packed schedule of July, I don't feel very excited or happy. Neither am I particularly sad or nervous about losing my precious 20s to time.

I'm feeling a tad lonely hut I think that in spite and despite, this year has been a bountiful harvest of blessings and growth with the lord.

I look forward to more and a more Jesus-filled new me in the new year.

Will come up with a thanksgiving list to recount how wonderful God has been and i am pretty sure it'll be a looong list.

Thank you Jesus for my life. Use it for your glory please.

Too sad but ''it is not the end of the world''

That's what he would say when I go semi-ballistic and pessimistic.

Joshua Gill left awhile ago and I think I haven't bawled so hard in a loong time. Ok, maybe I did when I was alone in HK but you get the drift.

I'm so not used to no musicals in the shower at 12 am.
I'm not used to the empty room.
I almost expect to hear the creaky gate open because he is sneaking home.
I almost expect us to sit in the kitchen for our ''fruit supper''.

2.5 months flew by just like that and our not-so-little baby has mounted on wings and taken off for new adventures.

It's been an adventure for us too and we will forever be grateful to be numbered amongst his 100000 (and counting) friends.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Secret ambition

To be Santa.
Been having stomach trouble for more than a week.

Time is whizzing by so quickly I sometimes forget dates. One of my oldest best friends is getting married tomorrow. That's the carrot dangled that keeps me going. I'm so excited and happy.

On anither note and apart from wedfing excitement, It seems ive been hit by Friday, pre-birthday blues. I've said this before but I can't wait for July to be over.

No title

I just need a lot of sleep.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Wake me up when July ends

Too emotionally draining for 31 days.

Dreading next week. And the week after.

Freeze time please.

Can't wait for august. Don't want to cry and feel so vulnerable. can't wait for national day.

Monday, July 04, 2011

This is why

This is why its unlikely I'll have more that a grand total of five true friends:

Not many in my life, in my deep inner circle are friends that go way back. The ones that go way back have had the prerogative of seeing me happier, less jaded and albeit gullible, untainted. They knew me before " psycho maniac" era and know that beyond those tendencies, there was another side to me that was real and existed, not mythical. Those that came after that can at most provide kindness in pittance form- benefit of the doubt.

Those that go way back knew me before my identity was fused with isaacs. Before my stubborn willful personality with the acerbic tongue was juxtaposed against my kind husband's like day and night. They have accepted me way before I tried too hard to fit into society's carefully defined mould.(and failed)

Yup. They have had the track record of accepting and loving me through my best and worst. Before my identity got subsumed in the crowd of larger personalities and my husband's. Before my presence became negligible and compromised.

Before I became a commodity and ordinary (apart from psycho depressive maniac)

These are the reasons.

Sunday, July 03, 2011

Note to self: I'm not a pig

Hence, I don't have to eat like one.

Stomach is in turmoil again from gross overeating. It's like I can produce enough methane for a nuclear reaction.

Ok, too much information.

Sleep tight folks.

Grateful

I'm so grateful that I can so easily access the throne of grace. I just close my eyes and cry and I immediately have an audience with the lord most high. Yet, this didn't come easy.Jesus had to die by 39 lashes, scorching, piercings for me to have this awesome wondrous privilege. The cross had to happen. Just so I could come.

The countdown has begun and July has descended!

Meetups, start work, work trip, farewells, anniversary,wedding and birthday meals.

I think July will fly by.
It will be an emotional roller coaster.
Or I might not have much emotions because I'm too distracted by work.

I think Isaac is going to cry. Because Chris Morrison and Joshua Gill are leaving. I don't think he even shed a tear when he dumped his exes.

This is huge. August with it's fireworks will pale in comparison.

July 2011. I wish you had 60 days.