moving right along!

i'm so excited. i've finally learnt to move on despite any doubt/personal inhibition/rising opposition.

there is a great wave of encouragement and i just know so much holds in store for me next year. i've even been warned that it'll be difficult but i'm going to give it a shot. my best shot.

for now, i just don't want to compromise now and i want truly only His best for my life. i am tired of looking left and right and allowing my thoughts to be weighed down by lesser things.

something is brewing and its good. and i'm going to get ready for it.

wedding prep:
i just want a simple party where i can afford to mingle with the guests, testify endlessly and laugh and laugh.

yes, its a bit stressful but i'm determined to make it a light hearted affair.

as for gifts, really, i have like 2 dining tables, 2 fridges etc. and i have a grandtotal of 1000 sf to play around with and i'm not too keen on choking it up with so many things.

so, if you're considering a gift, PLEASE ASK ME IF SOMEONE HAS ALREADY CHOPED if not i'll have to sell your gift.

to be unabashedly honest, cash is really preferred.

fatigued.

i haven't been the same.

first, my collar bones are in full glory again after semi disappearing. i lost about 2.5 kg in Europe. I don't know where i left it really.

and the sheer fatigue is resulting in a further loss of appetite which is just not helping. i konk at at 7pm when most of you are having dinner. i rush home to ...sleep.

then i wake up ridiculously early and by 2pm i'm like super zonked out again.

wedding stress is mounting and i wish i had a fairy god mother. my wedding planner is a great help but with great help comes great cost so i'm not willing to part with that much money.

i'm in no mood to think about honeymoon and all coz really i just want a breather and for things to fall into place. at the workfront, handovers and new launches are due at the same time. the whole thing sounds like an oxymoron and with a fatigued brain not working at full capacity, it's not going too smoothly.

in times like these, i really want to just curl into bed and sleep. i would like to say i can't wait for the weekend but these days, i realize that the weekend has a longer to do list than weekdays. so really, i'm trapped.

my idea of keeping in touch with my friends is the lengthy mails they post on my facebook. see, we can thank God for facebook too. (if only i can figure out how to post a video of the eiffel tower that i'd taken in paris)

wall street is crashing and financial giants are crumbling. did anyone realize that we're dangerously near oct 29 which was the date the stockmarkets crash in 1929? i hope this is not the sequel to the great depression. it almost sounds like a similar replica.

i find my trust violently shaken with nothing to hold on to. my hope is thankfully anchored to Him and yes while investments and jobs all hang in the balance and the world economyis hoisting a white flag when just 12 months ago, we were experiencing a financial boom, i have decided to live in the mountains and cultivate a habit of leaves and twigs.

i am kidding. its the fatigue talking.

mei ling...isst 2 mths already?hurry back! phonecalls to aust are expensive!

announcement

back. and i 'd love to talk more about the trip and give everyone updates. except that my brain is still stuck in sleep mode.

and i'm reallytired.

and i realized the only time i'd ever eat breakfast AFTER lunch is when i'm flying eastwards.

i don't know if i should be a fellow oyster.

me: remember not to accessorize /wear make up when we meet the Amish people.
her: why?
me: its offensive in their culture
her: how about pearls?
me:-exasperated- what are pearls?not accessories?
her: but they are just pearls!
me: ok. i'll tell them you're an oyster and you just produced them and can't take them off.

life without me!

so mei ling left tonight.
i'm so happy for her and i believe she'll have fun in melb with ah belle.

i don't know. it's not like we manage to meet so often in sg but i just hate it that she is two hours away and is not readily accessible to me. i'm THAT selfish.

what if i need a food kaki? what if i just need to feel silly and need company at that? who am i going to poke fun at now?

melbourne is stealing alot of my friends. despite being one of my favoritest places on earth, i have a love hate relationship with it because it stole so many pple i love.

its something about the not so sombre atmosphere (it's not as crazy as the west and not as fast as the east), the crazy erratic weather, the streets that i manage to somehow navigate, the sunsets and the good times i've had there with the same friends that trooped over that gave melby a special place in my heart.

it has been my place of temporary refuge everytime i'm down. in the past, it was so convenient to just book a ticket and end up at the doorsteps of a friend's place. now, its near impossible. because tickets no longer cost less than 1k. and time is scarce.

i feel like doing that now. but i can't.

australia is not home but somehow i want to go there like all the time. perhaps after this paris trip, this opinion will change.

which i'm looking forward to. if not for the fact that cologne follows after that and my schedule for colognenow is filled with..plenty of meet ups i wonder if i have time venture out to buy a pair of birks.thank God i already know my size.

**
at the lift lobby, as the lift door opens, this guy stepped out and upon seeing me said
"hi, i just left''

i was astounded. i mean huh why who is he. a thousand thoughts raced throughmy mind. is he a neighbour?did ilose my memory??is he somebody important that i forgot again?is he my relative who came to visit?

i just stood there literally with my mouth gaping for awhile. until he said 'you don't recognize me?!"

and all i could do was nod like an idiot.

apparently he is my brother's tutor who has been at my house every week for the past year. and he has said hi to me a thousand times before. and i never knew ....

this adds to the list of people who go 'hi xinying!" and i go ''ahhhhh..hi'